London Slog

Via Michelle Oshen

Jolly boring show! So it went for the Jints of New Yawk and the Dauphins of Miami in the NFL’s first regular season game played outside North America, a fairly transparent, rather ugly and clearly exhausting-for-the-players attempt to sell more of the NFL brand and its merchandise overseas (a pursuit that will no doubt be more successful than the never-ending futility of trying to sell soccer to Americans). At any rate (in this case slow as an English royal’s inbred speech pattern) our boys in blue won a grinding, muddy, old school-Giants-type game in the omnipresent English rain against the still winless Dauphins of Miami by the as-boring-as it-sounds score of 13-10.

Super-specimen RB Brandon Jacobs pounded and grounded out a last week’s topping and career high 131 yards on 23 carries and our boy Eli scrambled 10 yards (9.144 meters for those over there) for his first running TD of the year, despite notching a below par (rather un-American) 59 yards passing while the recently relentless Giant defensive line effected a subpar lone sack but shrewdly kept the ‘Fins out of the end zone for the first 58 minutes of the contest.

The combined seven fumbles and fourteen penalties attest to the game’s ugliness, and lacking any aerial excitement, the most highlight worthy play o’ the day (other than the obligatory English streaker at halftime) came on perennial All-Pro LB Jason Taylor’s vicious blindside sack of Manning, causing a fumble which was recovered by Miami after a rugby-like scrum. After Miami RB Jesse Chatman then reversed field for a 22 yard run (the longest play yardage-wise of a long-feeling time-wise game), Miami had a 2nd & goal from the 2 opportunity. But the Giant defense, which will surely benefit from next week’s bye week, benefited here from the wet conditions when a bungled snap set the Fins back 9 yards, ultimately forcing them to settle for a measly field goal.

The threat of a late surge of excitement when Miami reduced the Jints lead to 3 after reaching the end zone late was utterly snuffed by a misguided onside kick by Miami that skipped directly out of bounds, thus giving the Giants the chance to show the world how Americans really like to seal any wins we manage, by taking a knee and running out the clock on our opponents (take that, W!)

A win is a win, so we’ll take it, but can America take having our most exciting sport be about as compelling to Brits as watching British pop star Robbie Williams (who?) perform live would be to us Yanks?

Just some fresh sea-food for thought from the Oshen…